Episode #311: Stop Being a Carbon Copy
TAYLOR BRADFORD: You are listening to episode number 311 of the Boss Girl Creative podcast. Today I’m talking about stop being a carbon copy. On to the episode.
Hello, welcome to Episode 311. I’m your host, Taylor Bradford. Thank you so much for tuning in to this episode. It’s all about not being a carbon copy of anybody else but being yourself being who you are. That’s what we’re talking about today. By the way, if you want to be on the waitlist for the Inner Circle, it reopens in early August. Get on the waitlist by going to bossgirlcreative.com/InnerCircle. You don’t want to miss out on the next round, which opens August the first.
Alright. Also, if you haven’t been around these parts in a while, or if you’re new to the show, or maybe you’ve just taken some time off, whatever it might be, I want to ask, have you subscribed to my YouTube channel, which is called The House of Sugar Creek? I’m 12 episodes in as of the recording of this podcast episode. And I would so appreciate subscribers at this point because I’m trying to get to that elusive 100 for the ability to be able to capture my actual URL – to be able to say, “Hey, go to youtube.com/TheHouseofSugarCreek.” I can’t do that until we get to 100 subscribers, so I would so appreciate it if you would pop over and subscribe to my channel. It is a behind-the-scenes, curtain look at all things me, which has to do with Sugar Creek and Boss Girl Creative and all the other things that are going on. And it has been so fun to do. And I hope that you will go take a peek at that YouTube, go search The House of Sugar Creek, and I would love it if you would subscribe.
Alright, let’s dive in to not be in a carbon copy of anybody but yourself. And this episode was born out of knowing that I’m finally in the week of this really, really big wedding reception that I’ve been working on. And I happened to be scrolling Instagram last night and saw Liz Marie on her Instagram, talking about this is your journey, celebrate where you are right now. And I just want to read what she wrote in one of her stories that I happened to see. And this way, she wrote, “Remember why you started. Remember that what you have now was a dream at one point. Remember to take a few minutes to pause in thankfulness for what you have. It may not be perfect, but it’s yours. Your life, your journey.” And then this morning, before I sat down to record, I was scrolling through Instagram again and happened to see Connie share on her Instagram stories this quote, “You have to force yourself to get up early. You have to take care of your responsibilities. You have to be honest with yourself. You have to evaluate your priorities. Nobody’s going to do it for you. These are your goals and your dreams. Everything you want starts and ends with you.” And I thought this was really fitting because of what’s kind of been going on in my head over the last few weeks. And it prompted kind of this carbon copy thing. Like, we have to stop being carbon copies of other people. And yes, I know we go out, and we learn from people. You guys learn from me, but you can’t replicate me just as I can’t replicate you. And so we have to get out of this mentality that we – we have to stop being carbon copies. We are ourselves, and nobody can replicate us.
So I kind of want to start with my YouTube journey, which I have already podcasted about what I’ve learned about YouTube so far. And so this episode is not dedicated to YouTube per se, but I want to talk about this journey of my journey of YouTube so far. I’m 12 episodes in. That means I’m 12 weeks in because I’ve been publishing content once a week for the last 12 weeks. This week will actually be week 13. And what I find really interesting about YouTube – and I have learned from a lot of YouTubers I have learned from Katherine Manning, and I’ve learned from The Video Creators, I think they’re called the Video Creators lab, and I’ve been listening to podcasts about YouTube and just trying to understand the world of YouTube. And again, I seem to be marching to the beat of my own drum. I have asked some YouTubers like, “Hey, I’m a lifestyle YouTuber. That’s kind of the classification that I fall under. That is my channel. And it’s – that’s not a niche. I mean, it’s a category per se, but it’s not a niche. I’m not teaching you how to be an event designer. I’m not teaching you how to be a podcaster. I’m not teaching you how to flip furniture. I’m not teaching you how to upholster things. I’m not teaching you how to design a tablescape. I’m showing you what it’s like to be me. I am showing you what is going on in my brain. I am showing you my world and what is made up in my world. And I know that my why for doing this is to pull back the curtain and just be an inspiration to somebody. That is my why. To be an inspiration to somebody to do life on their own terms. That is my why. And that is really hard to translate over into YouTube because it’s very specific on – or I should say how YouTubers that teach YouTube – that teach people how to do YouTube. It does start with the why. Which you guys all know, that’s part of my pillars.
So I wouldn’t be doing this if I didn’t know what my why was. But they also like, get really specific on how to do things, and it’s like, I didn’t know that that translates very well into what I’m doing. So who’s teaching how to do it my way? And maybe it’s me. Maybe it’s me that that begins to teach it, how to do it my way. And I know that there’s algorithms, and I know that there are best practices, and I’m doing those things to the best of my ability. But at the end of the day, my why for doing YouTube is to do it my way, first of all, and to be an inspiration based on the things that I do in my day-to-day life. So my YouTube journey so far has been very unique in that I’ve been learning from the greats, I’ve been learning from the people that teach how to do YouTube, yet I can’t seem to find somebody that will answer how do I ultimately apply what they’re teaching to what I’m doing? Because I don’t think that they know. I don’t think that they have an answer. I think that they – if we had an honest conversation with them, they would say, “Well, you’ve got to find a super-niche, or you’ve got to do it this way. Or, you know, fill in the blank.” And I just don’t know, and I’m okay with that. I am totally okay with that. I think I was looking for kind of the holy grail as ‘here is the roadmap to being a YouTuber in the lifestyle category.’ And I’ve gone out and searched lifestyle YouTubers to see if, you know, they are teaching anything related to how to YouTube as a lifestyle YouTuber, and so far, I haven’t been successful. So I think I’m charting my own journey here, just as I have done with all of my businesses, which is where this podcast is coming from—not being a carbon copy—doing it your own way—marching to your own beat of your drum.
So yesterday, I believe or the day before – all my days run together, you guys. Most recently, on my Instagram as of this recording, I posted a picture of me in my truck with a bunch of vintage mirrors all wrapped up. And my caption was, “448 days and counting leading up to this really big event that I’ve designed.” And it has not been an easy journey. First of all, COVID. Hello. And there have been a lot of scope of changes not only to like the venue itself but to the design plan. And it’s challenged me in ways that I didn’t know I was going to be challenged, but you know, when you get challenged with something, you come out stronger and have learned something from the things that you get challenged by. And this particular design is the biggest one of my career to date. This event itself is the biggest one of my career to date. So no pressure or anything. No pressure. But it made me think, “Oh my gosh, Taylor. You have done this your way. You have built Sugar Creek your way. You have been full of intention. All of your decisions have been backed by intention. You have given it every ounce of determination that you’ve had that you could find. You’ve been super-mindful about what you say yes and no to. And grit, oh my gosh, the grit that you’ve got in your veins has driven you to this moment, to this week.”
So this production started on Sunday – truly started Sunday – but unfortunately, to weather it got pushed to Monday. So yesterday, I got to see this enormous tent be constructed out on the lawn of this venue. And oh, my gosh, just what that process was like. It gave new meaning to raising a barn. And I know we’re not raising a barn, we’re legitimately raising a tent, but the term, the phrase, raising a barn, getting the actual structure in place to support the walls and the roof. Like, watching that happen just gave so much more meaning to that phrase, raising the bar. And I can’t describe that feeling other than, Oh, my gosh. This is legitimately taking shape and creating something from nothing. Creating something from nothing other than here’s a lawn, create the space. And just this feeling washed over me of just pure pride. And like, Oh, my gosh, you did this. This is of your doing. This is of your making. And it was just a moment of, “Holy crap, this is so amazing. I did this through all of the things in the last six and a half years of my career in the wedding industry. This is where I’m at right now. I am raising a tent. I am raising the barn.” And it was just such a cool moment to witness. And today, I will make another trip to see the end result of that raising of the tent. And today, the electrical starts to get wired up. The installations start coming in. The draping starts being hung. Like, the actual shape of my design starts truly happening today, but it started with the foundation yesterday. Everything starts with a foundation. Everything starts with a foundation.
So I want to talk through not being a carbon copy of anyone else. Your clients don’t want you to be a carbon copy. You don’t want to be a carbon copy of anyone else. So don’t be a carbon copy of anyone else but yourself. Be a carbon copy of yourself. Now I know technically, we can’t duplicate ourselves, and that’s what a carbon copy actually is, but don’t be a carbon copy of someone else. Be yourself. I need you to also think bigger than the box. Like, I know people say think outside of the box. And yes, I think you should definitely do that, but let’s just get rid of the box altogether. You know, let’s just get rid of it altogether so that it’s not a hurdle and we are thinking bigger than ourselves. That’s what we need to be doing. Think bigger than the box. Just remove the box altogether and just be yourself and think as big and as bold as you can. Do things your own way. Do things that fill you up, do things that light you up, do things that are soul-giving to you. That light you on fire. That make you want to get out of bed every single day. Do things your own way. Focus and nurture yourself. Focus and nurture your business and focus and nurture your audience. Be generous and fuel your desires with your passion.
Tell people how they can work with you. We want to be generous. We want to give things away. This is how we build our audience. This is how we build our community. Give things away, be generous, but you also have to still make the ask by saying how people can work with you. People can work with me by getting on my Inner Circle waitlist for the membership into the Inner Circle, which you can go to bossgirlcreative.com/InnerCircle to get on the waitlist, or you can work one-on-one with me. There are ways to work one-on-one with me. You could go to the website bossgirlcreative.com and find that information. This is how you can work with me. I’m telling you Inner Circle membership or hire me one-on-one. If you want me to put my eyeballs on your thing, if you want my opinion, if you want me to give you strategy, that’s how you do it by either getting into my Inner Circle membership and taking advantage of those ways in order to work with me or hire me one on one. Tell people how they can work with you. Don’t assume that they know. Tell them how can they access your time. This is your sales pitch, and it doesn’t have to be sleazy. It doesn’t have to be smarmy. This is how you work with me. Tell people.
Be the person you secretly wish you could be. Just do it already. You are the driver of your own life. Take yourself where you want to go. Be that driver. Take control because you are that driver. I promise you, if you can dream it, you can do it. Only you can hold yourself back. You’re the problem. You’re in the box. Get out of your own way. Choose yourself. Write your own permission slip. Surround yourself with others that unconditionally support you. And just stop being the carbon copy of someone else. Be unapologetically you. Roll out your own red carpet. Don’t wait on someone else to do it for you. They won’t. That’s the reality. They’re working on themselves. You are good enough, and now is the right time. So get to speaking about your dreams out loud. We’ve got to get better at dreaming out loud. Surround yourself with people that, again, unconditionally support you and stay away from people that bring you down. Stop trying to make other people happy at your own expense. There is not enough time in this world for that. You got to show up every day for yourself. You got to be consistent. You know what you need to do, so it’s time for you to start unrolling that red carpet because your dreams are waiting for you. Don’t be a carbon copy of someone else. Be unapologetically you because you already have what it takes. Stop holding yourself back. This is your moment. This is your time.
Thank you so much for tuning into this episode. If you found it inspirational and you know someone that also needs a kick in the pants, send this to them. Tell them about this episode. Again, thank you for listening. Thank you for being with me on my business journey. I so appreciate you, and until next week, I hope you have a great rest of this week.