Episode #266: The Power of Positivity
TAYLOR BRADFORD: You are listening to episode number 266 of the Boss Girl Creative podcast. Today I’m talking about the power of your attitude because it’s all about your attitude. On to the episode.
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Welcome to Episode 266 of the Boss Girl Creative podcast. I’m your host, Taylor Bradford. Thank you so much for pressing play on today’s episode. We’re going to be talking about the power of your attitude. And yes, our attitudes are a choice that we make every single day and every single moment. It is a choice. Allowing too many things to have a negative impact on your attitude can just cause so many repercussions in your life, and hanging on them for too long, again, just keeps making this perpetuate on itself. And it forces you to pass on your attitude to others if you are feeling negative because it’s going to be stuff that gets us down and things that can negatively impact our attitude. And if we allow those things, the stuff or the things to impact us negatively, we’re going to pass that on to others, which will continue having this chain reaction effect of being negative and negative and negative. I’ve talked about this in the past where negative begets negative begets negative, but positive also begets positive also begets positive. So if negative and negative feelings and negative thoughts and negative occurrences can have an impact on our attitude, then we’re choosing for it to have that impact. Because it is a choice. Attitude is a choice. If you choose or don’t choose a positive attitude, other people, other things are going to choose it for you. Let me repeat that. If you don’t choose a positive attitude, other people or other things will choose it for you.
So, what I have actually started doing because I am really struggling with attitude lately, and it’s because I have no control over the world around me and the constant negativity that I keep seeing and feeling. And I’ve been trying to just stay in my own little bubble, but even my little bubble is starting to get weakened. And just like not having control, that is such a super hard thing for me. But what I’ve been doing is setting reminders on my phone. So I have an iPhone, and on my iPhone, I have a reminder app that comes with the iPhone, and I can set a list of reminders to alert me every single day at the same time every single day. And one of those reminders is, “I’m excited for what this day will bring.” Another reminder that I’m going to set for myself is “Choose positivity,” but I’ve got to write it as an affirmation, so I need to say, “I am choosing positivity today. I chose positivity today. I choose positivity today.” So adding those reminders – so right now my reminders are “I am a Money Magnet,” “Money is energy and endlessly flows to me and through me,” “I have a steady stream of perfect clients who pay me my full rates and book on the spot,” “I am excited for what this day will bring,” and I’m also adding “I choose positivity.” Setting reminders can also pull you out of some kind of negative space, especially if you’re really struggling with negative things around you because, again, attitude is a choice. So I’m going to challenge you to use some kind of a reminder app on your phone. So that you can have these affirmations, but you’re also reminding yourself that you get to have a choice about your attitude. Choosing positivity is a powerful choice. Choosing to have a positive attitude is a powerful choice.
When you control your attitude, you control your life. If you don’t control your attitude, then your life is out of control. This is something that you have to be disciplined in doing. You don’t just wake up one day and decide I’m going to choose positivity, and that’s just how it’s gonna be for the rest of my life. That’s great in theory, but the reality is that you have to make it a conscious decision, and you have to practice it. And you have to be disciplined in making that choice every day because you are the architect of your own mind. If you want to feel better, you have to think better, because the way you think drives the way you feel. So when we’re faced with a difficult or frustrating situation, we can choose to focus on the problem, engage in negative self-talk, and focus our emotional energy on the worry or the complaining. But if we are acknowledging what is challenging, you begin to discipline yourself to see that bigger picture, which also allows you to engage in choosing productive self-talk and focusing your emotional energy on finding a solution or on enduring the challenge. So we have a choice on how we react to things that are negative in our environments.
So if we are faced with a difficult situation or frustrating situation, we have to change the narrative that goes on in our brains, what goes on in our minds to say, “You know what, this is frustrating. I’m going to acknowledge that it’s frustrating, but how do I move forward? How do I take a learning example from this but move forward?” Positive attitudes do not ignore problems, or gloss over hard issues, or disregard what is challenging. Positive attitudes allow you to actually see things more accurately and thoroughly because it does not lock in on the negative aspects of your situation. So I found ten tips on focusthree.com that are things that we can be doing things that we can be practicing so that we can improve our attitude.
So number one is: start simple. Be self-aware of your attitude. Don’t just let it happen. Pay attention to it.
Number two: refocus, reframe, and respond when your attitude becomes impulsive or negative.
Number three: be aware of the things that tend to trigger a disruptive attitude in you. Anticipate and plan ahead.
Number four: manage your internal stories and scripts. Master the art of productive self-talk. Is your language helping or hurting? You talk to yourself more than to any other person in your life, so get good at it.
When there is a problem, this is number five: when there is a problem, acknowledge it. Then immediately focus on finding solutions and opportunities for action immediately.
Number six: ruthlessly eliminate BCD from your life: blaming, complaining, defensiveness.
Number seven: turn off the TV. Invest in yourself. Don’t waste your time watching other people’s lives.
Number eight: start every day with a time of reflection and preparation. Be disciplined and intentional about the way you start your day. Put yourself in a disciplined, driven frame of mind.
Number nine: be patient, be tough. It takes time to build a winning attitude.
And number 10: keep things in perspective. Never lose sight of the big picture because our attitudes are everything. It’s how we build a framework for everything that we do. If we are affected by negative things, then we are going to just ingest that, and it’s going to affect everything else in our worlds.
And it is something that has really been kind of plaguing me lately because I’m really struggling with everyone’s opinion on wearing face masks, or what are Governor’s going to do next, or you just fill in the blank. It is so incredibly hard to keep yourself with this fortitude of positive energy and positive attitude when so much is crumbling around you. And this is when I start to seek help. This is when I start to lean on my friends. This is when I start to need a counselor session, and I’ve talked about Better Help in the past of making that decision that I couldn’t handle this on my own anymore, and I needed help. So if you’re in that position right now, I’m going to encourage you. Go to trybetterhelp.com/bossgirl. That’s all one phrase together T-R-Y-B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P.com/bossgirl to receive a discount off of your first month of service.
So being able to handle your own attitude and being able to constantly put the positivity first is super challenging right now and it’s really starting to affect me again because it’s like two steps forward and then something we have no control over happens and then it’s five steps backwards and then regaining your footing and trying to figure out steps forward and how to keep making money in a time when there’s so many unknowns, and clients are rescheduling or canceling altogether. I had an October bride that was going to be a fairly large rental order has completely canceled, and a November bride who was already booked has rescheduled to next November. And you’re like, this is just really hard as a business owner and staying positive is really hard. So being able to work on your positive attitude and find ways to support yourself in these times is so incredibly important. And I want us to just be there to say that we’re not perfect, and I’m not perfect, and things are a struggle for me right now. And even though I am continually sharing about pivots that I’ve made in these times and things I’m working towards, there are dark moments that can really overwhelm me and can light short fuses in me and those aren’t places that I like to be, and those aren’t places that I have the right tools to handle all the time. And I’m just here to say that I’m not perfect, and I never want you to feel like I’m perfect, even though maybe what you see or perceive me to be, might be one thing, but I can for sure tell you that I struggle just as much as anybody sometimes and I am not perfect and I do drop lots of balls, especially when I am feeling down, or I’m feeling the negativity.
And so I’m here to say that it’s okay to feel that way. But we have to arm ourselves with tools and resources to step back into the light and step back into the positive attitude and figure out how to be disciplined enough to keep that working for us and to, you know, just surround ourselves with positive and I’ve seen people lately actually say they’re deleting the Facebook app off their phone and I kind of feel like sometimes that is not a bad idea. If I didn’t have groups to run and groups to check into, then I probably would jump on that bandwagon. But I do have things that have to be taken care of that are through the Facebook platform. And so, for me, that’s not very smart, but for a lot, it might be extremely smart to do. Like, what is triggering your negative attitude? What is triggering these negative emotions and feelings? It’s time to nip those in the bud and just stop allowing themselves to take space in our brains. So I’m here for you. I feel you. I know this is a very difficult time, and attitude is everything. So I hope that there is hope for us. I pray that there’s hope for us. I pray that we can work on our attitudes and find the positive, even when it’s super challenging to do. I pray that you can find that positive.
Thank you so much for listening to today’s episode. Again, shout out to the Inner Circle community members, you guys are awesome. If you want to be a part of the Inner Circle, go to bossgirlcreative.com/innercircle to get yourself in there. I will be back next week with another episode of the Boss Girl Creative podcast. Until then, I hope you have a great rest of your week.